If Clara Forgot
by xXxImpossibleGirlxXx
Summary: (Completed) This is an alternitave ending to Hell Bent. What if Clara never reversed the polarity? What if Clara was the one to forget?


Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who or any of the characters. All rights go to the BBC and Steven Moffat. The first part of this story was taken from a scene in Hell Bent.

"That's why I'm doing what doing." the Doctor stated. "And what would that be?" Ashildr quipped. "I'm taking her back to earth, somewhere safe, somewhere out of the way." he paused for a millisecond before continuing "I'm going wipe to her memory, every last detail of me, it'll be like our friendship never happened."

Clara watched the monitor her heart sinking in her chest, her mind racing a million miles per hour. How could he? Those were her memories! He had no right to take them away! "That may not be what she wants." Ashildr said smoothly. "I've done it before, it was done telepathically, but this time, I've got something better." Clara immediately grabbed the thing the Doctor had called the neuro block off the console. This must be how he was going to do it, She glanced up at the monitor when she heard his voice again "It's quite...painless."

Grabbing the Doctor's sunglasses of the console, Clara put them on with shaking hands and, looking at the neuro block, said in a clear voice "Reverse polarity." Nothing happened. "When are you going to tell her?" she heard Ashildr voice. "Right now."

Clara threw down the glasses and neuro block and turned around to meet the Doctor and Ashildr.

"You ok?" the Doctor asked Clara, as looked at them both with her back pressed against the console "Yeah...yeah, yeah, just no...my pulse" Clara breathed, trying to prepare herself for what was coming next. "Yeah, we'll fix that somehow I promise, you will remember Ashildr, of course." The Doctor said quickly."Yeah, sure" He frowned "I thought you'd be more surprised to see her." Clara took a deep breath "I was watching, on the monitor." she reached behind herself a grabbed his sunglasses.

The Doctor walked towards her and she stepped away "Ok." she breathed "No, Doctor whatever you're about to do, don't do it." The Doctor stepped closer to her. "It won't hurt, it'll be nothing, you'll just pass out for a moment." "And then" Clara demanded "When you wake, you will be fine." Clara shook her head "But.." "Clara, just listen to me." "Just say it. Come on. Tell me." "When you wake you will have forgotten me, forgotten we ever met." "And why would I want that?" Clara asked, trying to remain calm. "Because it's the only way that stuff in your head, the image of me, they could use it to find you!" he took a step closer and she took a step back.

"I...uh, I used these" she said holding the glasses out. The Doctor frowned "On what?" "That." "What did you do?" "What do you think? Ashildr's right, you see, we're too alike." "Tell me what you did." the Doctor commanded "What else? What else do you think I did? I reversed the polarity! Push that button Doctor, it'll go of in your own face!" "You were trying to trick me?" "What are you trying to do to me?" "I'm trying to keep you safe!" "Why?" the Doctor stopped and bewildered look on his face "No one is ever safe, I never asked you for that not ever! These have been the best years of my life, and they are mine! Tomorrow is promised to no one Doctor, but I insist upon my pass, I am entitled to that. It's mine."

The Doctor up until this point had been listening to Clara, walked away to the console. "Oh, Clara Oswald, what am I doing?" he turned to face her "You're right, you're always, always, right."

Clara shook her head slightly "So what happens now? Ey, me and you, what do we do now?" "I'm not sure if you managed to reverse the polarity, I'm not even sure that you can. It'll do something, to one of us, better than flipping a coin." "Doctor." Clara said softly. "You and me together...look how far I went for the fear of losing you. This has to stop, one of us has to go." Clara shifted her weight and walked to him. She wordlessly handed him his glasses, to which he returned to his jacket. "You really don't know which?" Clara asked "Let's find out." the Doctor replied holding out the neuro block. "Let's do it, like we've done everything else, together."

Clara closed her hand around the neuro block and looked up at him. "How bout' we just don't, why don't we just, fly away somewhere." she smiled "Oh, that'd be great, wouldn't it!" he chuckled. "Gotcha." she whispered and then giggled a bit looking up at him.

"Good luck Clara." "Good luck Doctor." and with that they pressed the button.

"What now?" Clara asked letting go of the neuro block "We just wait a minuet I suppose." "So one of us wi-" Clara wobbled a little, she frowned "One of us w-" She grabbed the console. The Doctor's eyes widened in realization. Clara's legs began to buckle "Doctor..." she whimpered. He caught her in his arms, bring them softly to the ground. "I don't want to forget!" Clara sniffed she reached weakly up to the Doctor using what little movement in her arms she had left "Can we hug?" she asked, her voice becoming uncharacteristically small "Please?"

Supporting her back the Doctor brought her small body up to his. Clara let out a small sob, resting her head on his shoulder "Thank you Doctor, for everything. You're my best friend!" she cried, tears rolling down her soft cheeks. "Oh, Clara Oswald," he said pulling back to look at her face. "I believe I should be the one to thank you, you have made me a better man. You have sacrificed yourself for me over and over again. You are selfless and kind," he could feel Clara getting heavier in his arms so, he shifted her where his arm supporting her head. "Doctor, I'm scared, I don't want to forget!" she cried, fresh tears rolling down her face.

"Shhh." the Doctor hushed her softly wiping the tears off her face. "Do you know what else I love about you? You are brave, and loyal, you never run out of people you care about, do you here me Clara?" She whimpered pitifully "I love you, Doctor." The Doctor almost dropped Clara. "I...I...I Love you too." he whispered. Clara smiled softly. "I'll check up on you every now and then. Make sure people treat you well." he smiled looking down at her. "Doctor... I'll miss you..." Clara whispered letting out a shaky breath, the corners of her vision darkening.

Clara's last look at the Doctor blurred by her tears.

The Doctor watched as Clara's eyes fluttered closed and his hearts broke. He pulled Clara back into his chest hugging her and stroking her hair. "Oh, Clara...Oh, Clara, I'm so sorry." It was all that it seemed he could say. Ashildr came and knelt beside him, looking at Clara sadly "I'm sorry." she sighed chewing the inside of her cheek. "As you should be." he frowned bringing Clara away from him slightly looking at her peaceful face. "You need to take her home before she wakes." "I know what I need to do!" The Doctor snapped. He pulled Clara closer to him and stood up kissing her head. Ashilder walked to the Tardis doors "When you get in a better mood, come and pick me up, I have a date in Space Glasgow to go too." and with that Ashildr was gone.

Typing in the coordinates to Clara's flat, the Doctor paced slowly around the console, wishing nothing more for Clara to wake up and know him.

The Tardis landed at Clara's flat and the Doctor carried her to her bedroom. Clara's bed looked almost unused, she had been traviling with him for so long now. The Doctor sat down on her bed, Clara still craddeled in his arms "How am I supposed to let you go?" he whispered. Clara mumbeled something and shifted in his arms.

The Doctor wasn't sure how long he sat there, on Clara's bed, but he knew it was a while. This was the closest he would ever be to Clara Oswald ever again. The Doctor finially, with slow and careful movements, layed Clara down on the bed, he removed her shoes, and draped a quilt around her. The lump in his throat grew and a singel tear tracked down his cheek. This couldn't be happening. This wasn't how it was really going to end was it? He leaned over Clara's sleeping form and pressed a kissed her head for the last time.

"Goodbye Clara Oswald," he whispered

"Miss ya."

Hope y'all enjoyed my story! I know I'm not the best a writing but it certainly brings me joy to do it! Thank you for taking the time to read it!


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